Monday, December 29, 2008

Looking on to the new year

As I take stock of the past year and what has transpired, I can only say that I am grateful beyond words. 2008 will forever stay in my memory as one of the greatest years of my life. I feel like I have accomplished more this year, grown more this year, and been blessed more this year than in any other time in my life. Since January I have gotten married, purchased a new car, purchased my wife and I's first home, and taken some major steps towards becoming debt free and changing careers so that I can utilize my degree. It's been a great year and one that I am very grateful for.

This year could have gone in the opposite direction quite easily. The car I was driving kept breaking down on me and costing me more money and time and frustration than it was worth. One day after a LONG day at work I was driving home and it quit on me. I called my family for help and they came. The car started up again and I continued my drive home. Three or four blocks later it broke down again...in the middle of an intersection, through which my younger brother and I had to push it into a near by gas station. I consider what happened next to be a defining moment in my life that helped shape my perception of situations we encounter in life. Red faced, drenched in sweat, panting, and holding back swear words...I did not speak. I refused to let a bad situation make a fool out of me. Previously in my life I would have thought that having to push a card made me look foolish, but now I understand that it's only letting the fact that you had to push a car ruin your day and losing control of your emotions that makes you look foolish. After a few minutes and a Gatorade I looked at my mom, who is ever the pillar of support, and said "Mom, I am done with this car." Note that there were no expletives in that sentence...a milestone for me in that moment. The house situation was similar. A short while after my new bride and I had set up the house we were renting and gotten everything just so, we noticed cracks in the walls. It came to light that the landlord had not taken care of a leaky pipe and house was in danger of falling in. We were forced to move out one month into a new year long lease. God used that opportunity and our faith in a bad situation to reward us with a great new house and place that we can call our own. It's pretty great.

Saturday, December 20, 2008

Feeling old and young all at once

This week has been crazy! My beautiful wife and I moved into our new home and thus took another big step towards being adults. I am so grateful for the support system of family and friends that Kimberly and I have who have helped us in the past few months and then helped us again this week with all of the moving chaos.Thank you all sincerely! I can not wait to get our new home all set up and decorated the way we want it and have our family over for the Holidays. It's gonna be great.

On the other side of the "feeling grown up" coin is the "I really am still that young at heart" side. I saw the weather forecast for Christmas and Christmas Eve today and almost cried. It is suppose to be in the mid to high 70's and that makes me sick! So, I am praying as hard as I can that something crazy will happen and we'll get an arctic burst or something and drop the temps down into at least the 30's. I am trying to have that child like faith that anything can happen. I know it sounds like a small thing, but it really takes a lot away from the holidays for it to be warm outside...at least it does for me.

Soon I will put up pictures of our new home.

P.S. Jesus, If you are reading this...I would seriously appreciate it if you could make it COLD for the next week or two. Thanks

Wednesday, December 10, 2008

A funny thing happened....

So, Monday I wrote a blog about how much I hated the hot weather in December and then very next day a miracle happened. It snowed in Austin,Texas! I am seriously starting to think I have magic powers. I made it snow it Dubuque, Chicago, and now Austin. I should really start thinking on a bigger scale and wish for something like winning the lottery or striking oil...or world peace or whatever.

My wife and I walked through our new home today and picked out everything we wanted them to fix or change. It was fun. "No no no! This paint is suppose to be Satin, not semi-gloss. I swear, if this isn't taken care of the deal is off!" yes yes...much fun. Now I start the longest week of my life...waiting to close and move in.

I am thinking about auditing a course or two at a local university. I have realized that I really like learning, and if it were something like Texas History or physics or something cool like that I could totally flex my knowledge on people at parties and such. By the way...do other states teach state history? I mean obviously no other state is as awesome as Texas...it seems like other state's history would be lame. Can you imagine having to sit through a semester on South Dakota history? Yikes.

Christmas is in 15 days. That is soon and I am happy. The whole family over and Kimberly and I's house for Christmas Eve is one of my favorite new traditions.

Monday, December 8, 2008

Warm Weather Sucks!

It's freaking December and it's 75 degrees outside! This really pisses me off.

The Cowboys blew it in the fourth quarter yesterday. I can't believe these guys. They have huge amounts of talent on that team and still manage to screw up a season they should have had all locked up.Lame.

I am reading, for the very first time, Anne Frank The Diary of a Young Girl. I really love reading books that aren't in your standard 30 page chapter layout. I find that I can stay much more interested if there are smaller sections to read at a time. Diary form is pretty cool thus far.

Everyday I work I am reminded that working for a huge corporation sucks. They can never make their minds up about anything and by the time and changes get down to the our level, it's time to change them again. I can't wait until I have a big person job. It's definitely sounding more and more appealing.

Here's a poem.

90 years have come and gone.
I have lost count along the way.
Children,grandchildren, and greats have I met.
Seems like only yesterday.
I have lived and I have loved
longer than I care to tell.
Now looking back on the life I've lead
I have done my best to live it well.
I have done the job God gave to me.
My children are all grown.
I found my peace and happiness.
Rest my soul.
I'm going home.

Sunday, December 7, 2008

Confidance

I understand that all people struggle with confidence. It is a rare occasion to find a person who has found that perfect amount that puts your right in the middle of self-conscious and arrogant. It's a place I hope to find someday. And when I find it, brother I am settin' up camp. I have struggled my whole life with being on one side or the other of confidence...sometimes both sides at the same time. I am very self-conscious about somethings and there are others that I am too prideful about. It is my hope that through time and practice I will be the type of man who knows his worth, but doesn't feel the need to convince others to see it.

He wears, in his smile,
A quiet confidence,
An assurance that is echoed
In his eyes.
No use for self-consciousness
or arrogance,
He smiles certain
with humility and pride.

So, that's just a little poem about who I want to be someday. It's a goal.

10 days till we move in! JACKED!

Friday, December 5, 2008

Bad News Never had Good Timing

Have you ever noticed that you always seem to get bad news when you are ill? The last time I was seriously ill I got a phone call and against my better judgement I answered the phone. The person on the other end informed me that my best friend in high school had been killed in a motorcycle accident. Today I learned that some one has been attempting to open credit cards with my personal information. Not fun.

I can't help but notice that I have not a single follower for my blog. That depressing.

So, speaking of depressing...I have been brushing up on my Haiku skills lately. If you are not sure what I Haiku is, I suggest looking it up on wikipedia. They explain it better than I can. Anyway, I wrote this poem in Haiku form.

Footstool and a noose
Winter heart-ache takes it's toll
Spring will never come

Personally I prefer poems that aren't as strict with they're guidelines, but Haiku is a beautiful form and a great practice in writing in thrift. I also have a hard time writing in this form about anything that is not completely depressing. Subconscious perception of the Japanese life?

I have noticed that I, being a long haired bearded man, get very strange and concerned looks when I walk around with a copy of "Catcher in the Rye". I suppose I should have expected this.

I am not sure what I will read next. I have never read "The Great Gatsby" but I have heard very good things. I also haven't read "Oliver Twist". Both good options.

Less than two weeks until we move into our new home.

Thursday, December 4, 2008

The sickness wears on

I am still feeling very ill, so I don't have the patience or energy to write much today. I do want to share a poem I wrote last night. Very rarely have I written poems that I felt said what I wanted them to. I am proud of this one.

I gaze up at a perfect night sky
Your hand in mine
The stars display infinity in the form of light
And I am amazed at the beauty of our fingers intertwined

Wednesday, December 3, 2008

Estoy Enfermo

There are things in life I am good at and things I am notoriously bad at. Being sick is one of the things I do poorly. I am sure this is just a cold, but I am not at all productive when I am sick. Oh well, this should blow over soon.

I have alot of art projects I hope to start working on towards the end of the month and the first part of the new year. One in particular that I am very excited about is going to be very interesting photographic collage that will be called "E Pluribus Unum". It's a multifaceted title. I have already contacted a few of the people I want to make the subject of this series and so far everybody is on board.

There is a photography project I want to do with my wife that I am very happy about as well. I will be taking a series of photographs where Kimberly will be standing in a crowd. The entire crowd will be facing away from the camera with the exception of Kim, who will be dressed in a wedding dress. I plan to develop the images in a sepia tone except for Kimberly who will be in color. It a visual representation of how I see her. Take from that what you will.

It's interesting that I have been working with photography because that is not usually my medium of choice. Although, I guess when inspiration strikes you follow where it leads.

Monday, December 1, 2008

My Travels

This past weekend I went with my wife and her family to a wedding in Iowa. We flew into Chicago Friday afternoon and drove the rest of the way to Dubuque. It was an amazing trip and one I will remember for ever...Unless, of course, I forget.

I saw alot of beautiful things and learned about a culture that seems almost completely different from the one I have grown up in. I loved finding the differences between the way people live in the northern part of the country in comparison to my dear beautiful Texas. I am very proud to be a Texan and could never actually move away, but there were aspects of the north that I really loved.The weather was the first thing I loved about being up north. They actually have FOUR seasons. It gets cold there, and I love the cold weather. In three days I saw more snow than I have seen in my entire life in Texas...cummulatively.The food in the south is WAY better.

I will probably post some pictures from the trip soon. You'll be jealous.

It's just about two weeks until I move into my new home. This excites me.

I am watching a movie called "The 9th Gate". It's about a book written by the devil and Johhny Depp is trying to find it. I am halfway through ( I had to go to work) and so far it is awesome. I have really been into the idea of collected books lately. Not specifically rare or antiquin books, but books I like. Maybe if I SUPER like a book I will try to get an early copy or something. That'd be cool.

I think I want to get a cocker spaniel like I had when I was a kid. That'd be sweet!